Got another good nights sleep but slept in slightly. Dragged my arse to the gym and really struggled with fasted cardio. As I was late up I could only complete 50 minutes which in a way was good as I was blowing out of my backside towards the end. A good exfoliation in the shower ready for my positively mahogany tan on Saturday (which I am looking forward to too much) and I was off to work. The amount of people who have said to me they can’t wait to see my tan as I will look well weird is increasing daily – I will look very strange but I can’t wait.

Now today’s mood was more silent than emotional and totally miserable and I did pick up (I think) around lunchtime. I found today really hard from an energy point of view, just walking is taking its toll on me but I think its physical and mental exhaustion which is why I am feeling it so much.

Today was my last workout before the big day and it was a back and chest day. Now I did struggle quite a bit as my shoulder is playing up again. So after Kerin kindly put some ibuprofen gel on for me and commented on how this is the most she has touched someone for a while and me commenting that this is the most contact I have had in a million years, I was back to the workout. Completed around 30 minutes of posing and I am happy with my quarter turns I just need to nail my side poses and remember to suck in my bloody gut! On the treadmill for the last time (not ever) for 50 minutes and I was done.

Back home to prep my meals for Thursday only as I need to send my pictures to Sandi tomorrow morning to determine Friday’s diet. I had to prep this food in the most horrendous conditions ever. My bloody housemate and his girlfriend were happily chomping away on pizza – my favourite food ever. To make matters worse they dipped the crusts in mayonnaise and that’s what I do. I can’t explain how good their food smelt. So I popped a chewing gum in my mouth and chewed it like there was no tomorrow whilst I prepped my food and then ran upstairs to hide in my bedroom.

Not long to go now and the nerves are growing and as is the feeling that people will be disappointed when they see me on stage. But I have put in so much effort and gone from a fat blob to going on stage in under a year, I just need to keep that in mind and not freak out.