So since my last blog my food and training has been on track and mood and energy levels pretty good apart from last Monday evening when I could just about stand up trying to train legs. So since my operation my body shape has changed dramatically (well to me it has) as I was not on diet and not training. One of the hardest things has been returning to the gym and having to look at this different version of yourself when you are working out. Closing your eyes does help but then you end up walking into things and people just think you are that crazy. I have been back in prep for just over 2 weeks now and have lost around 7lbs and muscles are starting to appear again. My friend Steph (England’s 4th Strongest woman) who I train with is amazed at how quickly my body has changed but the scales in my mind are moving too slowly. I think because I am desperate to get back to how I looked before my operation and get ready for stage (because I am a total nutter and have to do everything in an extreme way), I am panicking that I am not losing a stone every 4 days. I think my coach will be ready to kill me in a couple weeks as I am constantly messaging him panicking about the slow rate of weight loss – even though it is not that slow really.

My new prep diet is hard, really hard but I have not faulted not once. My focus even when I am exhausted and can’t string a sentence together is still high. I am bloody determined to do whatever is necessary to get back on stage this year. I keep looking at my new bikini to keep me motivated. I am that focused that when I received a lovely gift of fancy looking protein balls from Protein Kitchen, I put them in the freezer ready for after competion. The old Niki would have scoffed them in nano seconds and kidded myself that I would burn them off later at the gym.

It was Dad Quick’s Birthday (Mega Fan of MyProtein clothes) last weekend and we went out for lunch and to paint some pottery to keep me occupied so that I don’t think of food, and I was ok. I didn’t need to smell anyone’s food as I was ok with my turkey mince and green beans. I still find it difficult to look at oats or porridge at work as that is no longer in my diet and I LOVE porridge.

In order to keep my brain functioning and not become a total prep zombie, I am going to go back to daily blogs. That means I will have to start collecting ‘Facebook Friends’. And on that note it’s Facebook ‘Friend’ message of last week;

Facebook ‘Friend’: Hi how are you? You are lovely

Me: I am good ta and thank you.How are you?

Facebook ‘Friend’: I am in love with your calves

Me: Well that’s kind but I don’t think I have many pictures on my account showing my calves

Facebook ‘Friend’: Can I buy a a pair of your gym socks or trainers?

Me: I presume you want them used and not washed

Facebook ‘Friend’: Yes

Me: Can I ask why and what are you going to do with them?

Facebook ‘Friend’: So I can think of you when I hold them. I will hold them when I know you are enjoying yourself with another man

Me: How will you know I am with another man?

Facebook ‘Friend’: Do you not have a boyfriend?

Me: No

Facebook ‘Friend’: Can you please inform me of when you do get one or when you are on a date. How much for the socks?

Me: £15 for a pair

** it is worth noting that I wear Primarni gym socks 10 for £1.99

Facebook ‘Friend’: That seems like a fair price, I can pay you now

At this point I am bored of the conversation and forget to reply. A few days go by and the following is received;

Facebook ‘Friend’: I can pay more. Please can you take the money so I can have the socks

I am currently considering my prices.