So firstly sorry for not blogging yesterday but I had a bit of a bad day. The day started off as normal with fasted cardio and then back home for breakfast as I was working from home again as I had more deliveries for my new house. Around 10am went to get meal 2 and ate two rice cakes with butter on (I am obsessed with rice cakes at the moment) and then put my meal together and off I went. I did exactly the same thing when making meal 3 so threw the rice cakes away.

Finished working and went off to measure up my new house and get quotes for some work. Then went to the stables to see the horse and meet my friend as I had borrowed one of her showing jackets and she needed it for a show she is going to. It was at this point that it all went downhill. I went in the brew room before she arrived to see if there was any milk and spotted a bag of chocolate biscuits and had two. That was it I got the taste for chocolate and my mind had decided in a nano second that I was going to buy chocolate and a pizza for tea. I didn’t train, I did have a good catch up with my friend Emma who I haven’t seen in ages and it did make me realise that I need to get back riding and get the horse out competing again.

I did exactly what my brain had decided on and bought chocolate and pizza. I did show some restraint though and only bought that, during my last prep I had a major binge and I literally bought everything in sight and ate it even when I was full and felt sick. So although what I did will not help my prep at all it could have been worse and I did show some kind of control and stopped eating when I was full.

Afterwards the realisation dawned on me and at that point in time I felt depressed and angry with myself. So I tried to identify what had made me do this in the first place and I believe it is because although I have cooked my food up I hadn’t portioned it out. So as I am getting my things out of the fridge and seeing my housemates lovely food, my mind is wandering and then all willpower is lost.

So I spent all of last night making two weeks worth of meals. I just need to get back into the routine again and I will be fine.

Today I am going to the lakes to go walking with my friends and stay over. I am going to use this time to clear my head and get back on track – my friends won’t try and influence me as they are pretty focused ladies too, so I will come back refreshed and back on it.